My Second Birth Story

I was going through my saved posts and I realized I never posted the birth story of my second child. It was over a year ago, but I really wanted to share it because it was such a beautiful and positive experience that I feel it can reassure future moms out there.

Let's get one thing straight before I get started though. Giving birth is giving birth. Even though my experience was positive, it wasn't easy and required a lot of strength, dedication and self-motivation (much like anything of value in life).

It all started on a Monday night. I had only just stopped working the previous Friday and I was looking forward to having a couple of weeks to pack my bags, get the baby's room ready, spend some quality alone time with my first son and relax a bit. It turns out my little bundle of joy had another plan for us.

At exactly 37 weeks of pregnancy, Z decided to make a surprise appearance into the world. I was excited to meet him but at the same time I was a bit scared. I think that's normal though, doesn't every mom panic when she goes into labor? I was actually pretty worried I'd deliver on the side of street midway to the hospital seeing as my first delivery went so fast.

I had an appointment with my OBGYN earlier that day, at around 5pm. After doing an internal exam (you know the one), she confirmed that I was neither dilated or effaced; as in, ZERO. Pretty normal for 37 weeks of pregnancy. I returned home completely oblivious to what was about to happen. I quickly cooked supper for my family and rushed to my prenatal yoga class on an empty stomach. When I returned home, I was pretty tired, so I went to relax in bed a few minutes as I checked social media on my iPhone. My husband walked in to bring me supper, so I moved over to sit up and that's when I felt it, this weird kind of "mini explosion" in my stomach, sort of like a balloon popping. My first thought: "Um, that's not normal."

Then it happened; as I stood up to get out of bed, water leaked between my legs. I was freaking out, I was like: "Oh my god, am I peeing? Wait, no, I can't be... I can't hold it in!! Oh my god oh my god is that what it's like to lose your water? That's so weird!" So I quickly made my way to the bathroom as water was literally gushing out of me. I never lost my water during my first delivery, so I had no idea!

Since we had absolutely nothing ready, my husband rushed around trying to wipe water off the floor and pack as quickly as he could. I couldn't help because every time I tried to move, more water came gushing out and we had to clean it up, so I just sat on the toilet and handled the panicking and the phone calls.

I called our babysitter so she could watch over my older son (who was sleeping for the night, thank god!) until my father arrived. After notifying my dad, I gave my mom a call. She was with my grand-mother taking care of my very sick grand-father. She was supposed to be part of my delivery team, but she was so far away that by the time she arrived, the baby was born. Boo-urns. Anyway, I remember giving my sister a call because I needed someone to talk to that could calm me down and help me focus.

The babysitter arrived and Antonio (my husband) had finished packing the car. I ended up having to put a dress on so that I could put a big rolled up towel between my legs to absorb the water which would not stop coming out! I'm pretty sure I scared our poor 11yo babysitter with that towel.

So we're in the car and I don't really have contractions, some mild discomfort, yes, but nothing too wild. Panic attacks though? Um, yes. I was so worried I would die in labor. I know, ridiculous in this day and age, but I'm a worry bug when it comes to things like that. We arrived at the hospital, parked the car relatively far since the parking lot is quite small and there's rarely any space available. I had no trouble walking all the way to the maternity ward.

We arrived and the nurse gave some forms to my husband and asked me to come in. She wanted me to sit so that she could plug me to a machine which would monitor the baby's heart. I was like, plug? Sure. Sit? Hell no. She was not happy because she couldn't watch the baby's heart rate if I wasn't sitting. Um, you can use your stethoscope lady, or some other tool. I know it's harder, but I don't care about your comfort, I care about my well being and the safe delivery of my child.

At this point I started having mild contractions, maybe every 2 or 3 minutes? Nothing unbearable. I kept telling her to bring me into a birthing room, that it wouldn't take long, but she wouldn't listen and she kept telling me to calm down. I think she was annoyed at me but I knew how my first delivery went and I didn't want to deliver in the hallway.

After about a half hour, she finally took me into a birthing room and since she hadn't offered a hospital robe, I took off all my clothes (one less thing to worry about). She sent another nurse and a student to take care of me, both of which had no idea what to do.

I asked for a birthing ball because I remembered how good it felt with my first. Sadly, it didn't work this time. When I tried to sit on it, the pressure on my pelvic area was unbearable. I had no clue how to position myself so I just stood up, placed my hands on the side of the bed and put my weight on my hands.

Contractions started to be a bit more intense at this point. I swayed from side to side between contractions and during contractions I squatted like a frog while doing my disturbingly long and low-pitched "ohm" sound. My husband was trying to massage my lower back and do pressure points like the nurse had shown him during my first delivery. Alas, he didn't remember where, or how, and it was doing more harm than good, so he stopped. He rubbed my back instead and brought me as many cold compresses as he could.

I remember the nurse asking me if I wanted laughing gas at one point and I'm pretty sure I gave her a death stare. I kept asking for things like ice and a massage and she didn't budge. I was seriously disappointed in the service she offered. To top it off, my mom hadn't arrived yet. I was doing it all alone. Next time I'm getting a Doula for sure.

Anyway, after a while I thought: "If this is anything like the first, I must be at around 7cm dilated now. It hurts so much and I have no help! I'm never going to make it to the end." I should have remembered that usually when you start wanting to give up, it's because the end is near...

Low and behold, it starts to push. I was in complete disbelief. I was like: "It's pushing, it's pushing!" I struggled to get onto the bed as the nurse said: "That's not possible, let's see how much you're dilated." As I got onto the bed on 4 legs, my body pushed a second time (note: my body, not me) and the head came out.

After that, all I remember is the doctor rushing in while putting her gloves on and asking: "Are you really going to deliver like that?" I starred. Enough said. She said push, I pushed once and the baby came out. He was born at 3 past midnight.

I turned, they put his little naked body on my chest and he pushed with his little arms to look up at me. It was magical. I let him snuggled with me a bit before helping him to my breast to eat. But that's another story...

My 5 Basic Pregnancy Must-Haves

Not too long ago, I decided to start sharing my pregnancy and motherhood experiences:

• 5 activities I enjoyed during pregnancy

• my first birth story

• what to expect during pregnancy

Today, I wanted to share 5 things which were a must for me during both of my pregnancies. I'm well aware that each pregnancy is different, and I'm not a doctor, but these are things that helped me during both of mine, so I thought I would pass the information along. It never hurts to share, right? :)

SNACKS

For me, this was an absolute must. In the beginning, I felt so sick and bloated that I was worried eating would make me feel worse. It didn't completely make the nausea disappear, but it did help a lot. I could only eat bland tasting foods like crackers and nuts, yogurt, stuff like that, and it had to be in small continuous portions.

COMFORTABLE CLOTHES

With all the body changes, comfort was super important for me. At least, as much comfort as possible. I wore lose stretchy clothes (like leggins, long tank tops and cardigans), flat shoes and sport bras. What I love most about all of these items is that you can use them before, during and after pregnancy. Saving money is important right?

PRENATAL VITAMINS

This is a basic item during pregnancy. My OBGYN recommended I take some to help me deliver all the necessary nutrients to my growing baby. I never say no to helping my baby grow safe and strong!

EXTRA PILLOWS

I heard a lot of hype about body pillow but they didn't work for me. I always ended up very uncomfortable. What I did find comfortable though, was having lots of pillows around me. One between my legs, one under my head, hugging one, and one in my back. Everyone is different so play around to see what works best for you. Essentially, this helps keep your spine straight and for me, it also helped with lower back pain.

TUMMY BUTTER

I'm sure everyone knows about stretch marks. The bonus question is how to avoid them. Is it even possible? I was lucky and didn't get any during either of my pregnancies. I used Palmer's Cocoa Butter Formula and loved it. It smells delicious and feels rich on your skin. I also used organic coconut oil. Even if it doesn't help with stretch marks, you can always ask your loved one to give you and baby a nice massage!

“What kind of things helped you during your pregnancy?”

5 Activities I Enjoyed During Pregnancy

I've always heard you should keep doing the same physical activities you're used to during pregnancy. For me though, that would have meant sitting in front of my computer screen all day long. No way that was going to happen. I wanted to take good care of the little one growing inside me, and of myself, to prepare for delivery. I wanted light activities, that I could easily build up and maybe even continue after giving birth.

PRENATAL YOGA

I remember thinking I would never EVER do yoga, it was much too weird, those positions, the heavy breathing, why would anyone like that? I had no idea how amazing it actually is. When my masseuse suggested it to me I kind of laughed in my head. On my way back home though, I figured why not? She'd always given me very good advice and I trusted her. This was BY FAR the best activity I did for myself; I even returned during my 2nd pregnancy. I have to be honest though, it really depends on the teacher, and how serious you are about it.

My first teacher was awesome, she showed us basic positions and encouraged us to try harder variations depending on our capacities. The cat/cow pose did wonders for my lower back pains (it was also the most amazing way to push during the last phase of labor!). The child's pose helped me a lot with relaxation and deep breathing (even during labor!). The butterfly pose was great for helping widen my hip bones and the goddess pose allowed me to practice muscular endurance combined with breathing exercises (which helped prepare me for dealing with the pain of labor).

The most important thing I learned though, was how to breathe and not feel stupid about doing it loudly. We worked on vocal ohms during most poses (my second teacher didn't do this and I was quite disappointed). What is ohm you ask? It's a deep breathing sound that comes from deep within. The weirdest thing ever, seriously, I felt like I was mooing like a cow. You know what though? This was probably THE BEST thing to practice for delivery. During labor, this is one of the only things that helped me stay focused and relaxed. Instead of thinking about the pain, I would thing about those very long deep sounds I was making. Magic.

PRENATAL SWIMMING

I've always loved water so naturally, I had to inquire at the pool if they had prenatal programs and they did! So I registered. I remember thinking I looked pretty silly jumping up and down in the water and walking around waving my arms. At first I didn't think it was helping me much, but after a while, I discovered that the intensity of the workout depends on how much energy you put into it. I pushed a little bit harder every class. I'm not sure how much this activity actually helped me physically, but it was nice to think about something else for a while and get out of the house. I didn't end up doing this activity for my second pregnancy but I'm glad I tried it out.

By the way, this is probably one of the times you'll be wanting to wear a bikini. I've always been shy about my body, but being pregnant is just so beautiful that I felt super comfortable showing off my new curves. Which worked out well because I didn't have to buy a completely new bathing suit. Although I did have to change the top because my breasts engorged so much that my existing one ended up looking like tiny little triangles. Lol.

WALKING

I really enjoyed walking during my pregnancy. It was a nice way to get some fresh air, spend some quality time with my husband, and get moving. This is an activity that I continued doing with my children once they were born. It's good for everyone, forces us to spend some time together, and it's a great activity to give you a break from entertaining your kids (especially if you don't want to use the television as a distraction).

PROFESSIONAL MASSAGES

If you don't already do this on a semi-regular basis I strongly suggest it. Even if it's just once a month, it's totally worth it. Getting all those tensions out of your muscles is a must, especially during pregnancy. All the changes going on in my body caused me discomfort, and this was an amazing way to ease my body into accepting these changes. I did this for both of my pregnancies and continue to do so when I need some "me" time. 

GOING OUT

Restaurants, operas, plays, weekend escapades, or even just to the movies. I tried to go out as much as I could before I had my first child because I knew it would be a while before I would be able to do so again. I'm glad that I did and would most likely do it WAY MORE than I did because now I know how much "no time for myself" actually means "no time for myself". I figured I'd have at least an hour to myself every day. Nu-hun. Nope. Nada. Even when/if I can find a little time to go out, I either end up feeling guilty or thinking about my kids the entire time. I'm sure this is something that will fade over time, but for now, it's a little bit overwhelming. In any case, I quite enjoyed taking the opportunity to go to the movies and eat out during my pregnancy.

The most important thing I got from doing these activities though, is some time to reflect on my pregnancy; what I wanted to get out of it, what I hoped for my little one, how I wanted my delivery to go and what role I wanted my husband to have in the process. It also gave me the opportunity to make friends with other women that were going through the same thing as me.

Disclaimer: I am not a health professional, I am simply sharing my personal experience hoping to encourage future mothers. What worked for me may not work for you. Always consult your obstetrician with questions concerning your pregnancy.